St Andrew: I am not worthy to have the same manner of death as our Lord so if you must crucify me then may I request you turn the cross upside down?
Roman guard: Oh is this like a thing or something with you guys? We were just talking about how that Peter guy asked the same thing in Rome
St Andrew: What the fuck? Are you serious? This was my idea first and I told him about it and Peter goes off and does it before me?What a fucking asshole uhhhh what about an X shape can you do an X shape like that’s still a pair of wooden beams right
Roman guard: I mean, an X would be a entirely different thing and I’ve never designed something to asphyxiate hanging from an X but, ok you know what that sucks your friend stole your idea and did it first so sure we can make it work
Both Orwell’s mother and father’s families were European colonial aristocrats. His great-great-grandfather was an Earl who owned several sugar plantations with over 200 slaves in Jamaica. He was compensated for their “loss” in 1833 by the British government (using taxes reaped from colonial profits) when human slavery was made illegal by the British – in an attempt to forestall the powerful slave uprisings threatening the destruction of European colonies in the Caribbean, as had happened with Haiti. Orwell’s mother came from a line of French colonial investors. His mother’s sister would financially bail Orwell out multiple times in his life. Orwell himself was born in the British Raj: colonial India which was the ‘Jewel In The Crown’ of the British Empire – from which they extracted an estimated $45 trillion. His father was an opium inspector. […]
Orwell grew up with a team of maids and servants serving him and his family as lords and masters. Throughout the rest of his life, even as a socialist, Orwell never regarded colonized peoples as his true equal. In 1912 Orwell’s family moved to Britain. Orwell says he took his “first sniff of English air” and never wanted to leave. He was enrolled in Eton, the most elite boarding school in the country – they had so many alumni reaching the rank of Prime Minister that the school established a tradition to give the students the day off for the occasion. […]
After graduating from school Orwell took the decision as a 19 year old man to join Britain’s Indian Imperial police in Burma. […] A nationalist movement, led by Buddhist monks, was growing in the region, and there were anti-colonial riots spreading in the country. Young Orwell was given counterinsurgency training by the British colonial administration – techniques which he would use throughout his life, culminating in the older Orwell’s final collaboration with MI6 in the last months of his life.
Orwell also had fun: an opium smoker and habitual brothel visitor during his six years in Burma, he wrote crude poetry about the young girls he slept with, paying them pennies. His acquaintances decades later said George would become wistful when talking about Burmese girls. He of course had many servants, and wrote in his diary how he would beat them when they displeased him. He mentioned that his 12-year old boy servant was beautiful and touched him like a woman, whatever this might mean: “When you have a lot of servants you soon get into lazy habits, and I habitually allowed myself, for instance, to be dressed and undressed by my Burmese boy. This was because he was a Burman and undisgusting; I could not have endured to let an English manservant handle me in that intimate manner. I felt towards a Burman almost as I felt towards a woman. Like most other races, the Burmese have a distinctive smell—I cannot describe it: it is a smell that makes one’s teeth tingle—but this smell never disgusted me. (Incidentally, Orientals say that we smell. The Chinese, I believe, say that a white man smells like a corpse. The Burmese say the same)”
The lanky, awkward, Hitler-mustache wearing Orwell was known to react furiously when Burmese colonial subjects deigned to show him the proper respect. In one incident he beat a group of school boys in the street when their “yellow faces” “provoked” him.
[…]
Orwell was gradually positioning himself as a socialist (in 1937 the British Communist Party rebuked him for travelling to Lancashire to “see how the working class live” and focusing mainly on how they smell – while never mentioning their bosses making their lives miserable) and when civil war broke out in Republican Spain, Orwell announced to his new wife […] that he was leaving immediately for Spain. The International Brigades were organised by the Communist International; and the British Communist Party rejected Orwell for his anti-communist views. The International Brigades were organised by the Communist International; and the British Communist Party rejected Orwell for his anti-communist views. So Orwell got a letter from the ‘radical’ Labour Party pressure group (the Independent Labour Party), joining a band of British trotskyites embedded in the POUM trotskyite militia in Spain. Many of Orwell’s British and other comrades within this militia eventually turned out to be British (and fascist) intelligence agents. This characteristic – a secret Military Intelligence background – was also revealed later with the intellectuals and writers in Orwell’s social circle years later when he became a successful writer. Orwell was posted to the Aragon front, and saw little action. However he got wounded by a sniper and was sent to Barcelona for treatment. While he was there the POUM militia launched a coup against the Republican government, and Orwell participated in it. If Orwell fired any bullets in anger during the Spanish Civil War, it was as likely at Spanish Communists as fascists. After the failed POUM coup, Orwell was briefly arrested by the Spanish republican police who found a copy of Hitler’s Mein Kampf in his possession. […] When Orwell got back to Britain he wrote ‘Homage to Catalonia’ based on his experiences. However his small left-wing publisher baulked at publishing the anti-communist text Orwell had written, as war against the Nazis loomed on the horizon. Orwell took his book to publisher Frederic Warburg, an anti-communist who was later revealed as an MI6 and CIA asset who published the first English language translation of Mein Kampf in Britain.
[…]
While the Soviets were defeating the Nazi war machine alone at Stalingrad, George was writing in his is nationally published column that “criticising Russia and Stalin” are the test of intellectual bravery.
[…]
A subtle but key part of 1984 is its misogyny, with the only female character in it depicted as a brainless and sexually promiscuous vamp. Orwell’s “childhood sweetheart” recognised this character as based on herself; when she wrote to Orwell, he responded with a cold and accusing letter. She later revealed that Orwell had attempted to rape her when he was aged 17. Orwell had several other accusations of sexual assault: one against a BBC colleague, another against a school teacher and many against his friends. Numerous of his sexual partners were from subservient positions; he slept with numerous secretaries for example. As a 27 year old man he gave a love poem to a 15 year old girl who he was a family tutor to. Orwell was also a serial “sex tourist” visitor to the poor and colonized world, where any sexual assaults would not have been recorded. […] We don’t know if Orwell fathered any children during his is sex tourism. However for his beloved English nation, he wanted abortion banned for “patriotic” reasons.
[…]
Orwell heavily “borrowed” (or stole) ideas from his wife or from Soviet author Yevgeny Zamyatin in writing his novels Animal Farm and 1984. Another victim of Orwell’s intellectual theft was Gertrude Elias, a Jewish-Austrian refugee who fled the Nazis for Britain and met Orwell in 1941 when they were both working at the Ministry of Information. A talented artist, she showed Orwell some of her drawings and storyboards for a fairy tale allegory about the Nazis as pigs taking over the farm. Orwell being a writer, she thought they could collaborate. Orwell of course stole the idea, but flipped the meaning: instead of warning about Nazis, he targeted Communists and the USSR. This was a pattern for Orwell: stealing communist work and perverting the meaning. […] Aside from making a mockery of scientific socialism, the tool for liberation of the working class, Orwell spends much of his writing mocking the working class themselves. […]
His hate for the colonised working class was even more explicit. About his time in Burma Orwell wrote: “As a police officer I was an obvious target and was baited whenever it seemed safe to do so. When a nimble Burman tripped me up on the football field and the referee (another Burman) looked the other way, the crowd yelled with hideous laughter. This happened more than once. In the end the sneering yellow faces of young men that met me everywhere, the insults hooted after me when I was at a safe distance, got badly on my nerves. The young Buddhist priests were the worst of all. There were several thousands of them in the town and none of them seemed to have anything to do except stand on street corners and jeer at Europeans.”
About the masses of Marrakech, Orwell wrote: “When you walk through a town like this–two hundred thousand inhabitants, of whom at least twenty thousand own literally nothing except the rags they stand up in–when you see how the people live, and still more how easily they die, it is always difficult to believe that you are walking among human beings. All colonial empires are in reality founded upon that fact. The people have brown faces- besides, there are so many of them! Are they really the same flesh as yourself? Do they even have names? Or are they merely a kind of undifferentiated brown stuff, about as individual as bees or coral insects? They rise out of the earth, they sweat and starve for a few years, and then they sink back into the nameless mounds of the graveyard and nobody notices that they are gone.”
While he was writing 1984 Orwell was regularly visited by a social circle of intellectuals, both “socialist” and reactionary, many of whom had intelligence ties. One of these colleagues was “socialist”-turned-neocon Stephen Spender, despite Orwell despising to him as a ‘pansie’ due to his homosexuality. Being a “friend” of Orwell, as well as a fellow so anti-communist “socialist”/neocon and intellectual working for British military intelligence, did not save Stephen Spender from making the list Orwell handed over to MI6 in the last months of his life.
One of Orwell’s contacts was Celia Kirwan, a researcher and agent at the Information Research Department – which was a global anti-communist propaganda project run by British military intelligence targeting both the Western public and the colonised peoples of the Global South. The IRD was set up by the “progressive” Labour government of Clement Atlee in 1948. Their first mission was to hammer into the public’s head that the Nazi death camps which the Soviets had liberated were not as bad as imaginary Soviet death camps. This was to distract from the concentration camps and genocide the British where inflicting on on Malaya/Malaysia and Kenya at that time. Kirwan’s boss at the MI6 IRD was “historian” Robert Conquest creator of much “black propaganda” about the Soviet Union – the “Great Terror” to describe the 1930s was one of his inventions. […]
As a cop trained in intelligence work from age 19, Orwell kept detailed notes on contacts and popular figures, be they “friend” or foe. The list Orwell handed over to his MI6 handler contained at least 130 names (he may have handed over 3 different lists with hundreds of names) with notes – a third of which are still a British state secret to this day. Those that have been publicly released reveal Orwell’s bias. Ignorant adjectives such as ‘anti-white’, ‘Irish.’ and the frequent ‘Jew?’ are liberally sprinkled. His entire body of work, full of contempt and derision towards the colonized, Irish and Jewish people can be consulted in case this bigoted policeman’s report is not clear.
[…]
America has never had a ‘Department Of Culture’ to support artists, writers, musicians and other cultural workers – except ironically for a CIA front called the Congress of Cultural Freedom. This ‘congress’ was how the CIA managed a network of foundations and NGOs to promote Capitalist Art and Western Supremacy among intellectuals. Philosopher Bertrand Russell, theorist Michel Foucault, artist Mark Rothko, filmmaker Cecile B DeMille, feminist Gloria Steinem were some of the many cultural figures funded and brought to prominence by the CIA. Also established by the CIA Congress of Cultural Freedom project in the US, the Information Research Department in the UK and similar operations worldwide was a library of progressive and ‘socialist’ magazines aimed at intellectuals – all with one united cardinal rule: they had to be anti-communist. The man who conceived of the Congress of Cultural Freedom was another “former communist” CIA agent, Arthur Koestler. Orwell was good friends with him; like Orwell, Koestler was also an accused rapist. Koestler was himself married to the twin sister of Orwell’s MI6 handler, Celia Kirwan. Orwell was in fact a key figure in this nexus. In 1945 he helped set up the “Freedom Defence Committee”, anti-communist rival to the powerful communist-led human rights network at the time. It was through this that he met Arthur Koestler. Together they strategized the concept of the the Congress of Cultural Freedom. Together they attempted to form a human rights group similar to Amnesty International which, was established 15 years later – by a lawyer who was also an FBI informant on radical groups in the US, spying on the Black Panthers and assisting in the assassination of Fred Hampton. […] Orwell was a central figure in this formation, however his early death just as the Cold War was taking off, meant that this life long-cop and agent never took his mission to the next stage. Instead his social circle of “friends” went on to be successful writers, editors, founders and other agents in this cultural war-machine. Orwell himself became something of a Patron Saint of these propagandists, the cartoon made of his book Animal Farm was not only the first animated film made by the CIA, but the first feature length British cartoon ever made.
Orwell today is a standard staple of school curriculums, and both young children and grown academics are taught to put aside critical thinking facilities when evaluating what Orwell stood for. However when we lay out and assess the private thoughts (shown in his personal diary and private letters), his public beliefs (taken from his many books and articles) and his actions (the various projects, campaigns and activities he participated in) we can sum up the following themes that Orwell stood for: misogynist, homophobe, racist, Imperialist, anti-communist, poverty-tourist, state-propagandist, hypocrite and bad writer.
the gimmick blogs are like tumblr’s rogue gallery. yes we’ve got some heroes, yes we’ve got some villains, but more importantly if you look over here you will see some freak who devotes all their time to counting the number of “t’s” in a post
T Count: 15
Letter Count: 198
Your T Percentage: 7.58%
Average T Percentage: 6.95%
You used the letter T 1.09 times as much as average!
YOU EXIST???
Sometimes you create a guy and it turns out they already exist
so prefacing this with the fact that I know that the fun is sorta taken out of this by me translating, but not everyone will have the energy to look it up themselves, so I figured I’d help out.
Morse code: AEEEEE FELL DOWN AND TROKE MY PENIT TODAY YEOWCE OUCH YOUCH!!!! SENT FROM MY TELEGRAPH
Inspired by the word searches I shared yesterday, here is a brand new way to discover your gender! The first word you see is your shiny new gender identity!
This is just for fun! A lot of the words in there are random. :)
pushing daisies really was a modern retelling of orpheus and eurydice in which they knew they wouldnt make it out of the underworld so instead they simply built a life together on the stairs
funniest thing about horror games is when they’re like “you can hide in here by the way :) why would you need to hide? don’t even worry about it bro” and then you turn around and a fucked up guy is coming at you like this
